Sunday, January 14, 2018

I miss you ...


I miss you dear one
I miss your words 
I miss our friendship
I never meant to hurt you
I am sorry 
I love you as a friend 
Life seems empty and pointless
without you in my world...

For you C.B. my dearest friend. xoxo

9 comments:

Crissi said...

Wonderful words dear Dianne!!
Lots of love from a distance!
All the best
♥ hug ♥ Crissi

dianne said...

Thank you dear Crissi for your sweet words and wishes. I have unintentionally hurt a dear friend and I am hoping he will return and read my words. I trust that you are well dear friend? All the best from far off Australia!
Love ❤️ and hugs❤️ Dianne!

dianne said...

I have been hoping you would return dear C.B., I have looked for you. Remember you said that we would always be friends. If you did really care for me we could still be friends as we have been for the past ten years. When you disappeared all of those times and I never heard from you I didn't give up on you, I welcomed you back with love, affection and friendship even though my heart was breaking...believing I would not hear from you again.
I wish I was perfect, beautiful, my scars healed, healthy and for my ailing heart to be mended. I have prayed for this but nothing changes. When I die how am I to find you as in all these years I have never seen your face, not one photo of you? At least when I die I will be free of this imperfect body and you will see the beauty of my spirit, if you ever look for me. I never meant to hurt you! I believed that you would think of me occasionally and visit when you felt like it, that I meant nothing more to you than many other women you would visit. If only you had spoken those words to me a long time ago...those feelings you have expressed, how I longed to hear them. Now I am too old to start all over again. Take care dearest one, I hope that you will still be my friend.
Much love, Dianne xoxox

Anonymous said...

I will remain your friend always, Dianne. Very difficult times I am going through at the moment. I wanted so much to be somebody worthwhile. To be of consequence. I realize now more than ever how short life is. I think that I yet will be able to achieve something. I'm not sure what. I try to grasp at something but all I grasp are my palms with my fingertips. It's so long ago but I know that you know and that is of great comfort to me. While the ivy leaves rustle in the wind on the side of the tree, life is not empty. Life is not pointless. You know that. If I could I would seize you and hug you, encircle you with my arms. You know that. Without a lead, you write words of great kindness, of thought, of compassion, of love. It's not unnoticed. By me. Certainly, I am sure the Great One sees all that you do and will reward you in a way you will not see arriving. I sleep very little these days. A couple of hours at most. And so, I feel tired much of the time. But, I am all there, all feeling, all feeling. My world is still very round. I heard a song that reminded me of this this evening and I thought of you. Kocham cie. C.B. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJxSmANo24s

dianne said...

Dearest C.B. I was so happy to hear from you, I could not bear the thought of not hearing from you again. Thank you for being my friend, you are very precious to me. I realise how much I have lost by not running into your open arms. Life is too short, I have wasted the best years of my life alone and with someone so undeserving. I wish we had met a long time ago when I could offer you so much more and give you all the love and affection you deserve. I can imagine how wonderful it would feel to be enclosed in the warmth of your arms, the closeness, my face resting on your chest, my arms holding you too. You are somebody worthwhile my dear, never doubt that, one of the most sensitive, kind, caring people I have known. You see and feel so much more than others, the beauty that others don't perceive, overlook or don't appreciate. You are highly intelligent, articulate, compassionate, the list of accolades is so long. I'm sure you have achieved so much in your life, think back over the years. Being a good human being is an achievement and you should be proud of that. I'm sorry that you cannot sleep, it's not good feeling tired all of the time. When you go to bed try to think of pleasant places you have been or visited. The wind in the trees, your Ivy covered tree, the sound of falling snow. Think of me, you are constantly in my thoughts and I am watching over you from afar. I am pleased to hear that you think that life is worth living, for myself I wonder sometimes...but it goes on regardless. Take care dear one, I love you too! D.D. X

dianne said...

Hello my dear C.B. I hope you stop by soon! I had a restless night last night, drifting in and out of sleep. I was laying there looking out of my window, the moon was like a large golden ball, glowing, so beautiful. I watched it until it disappeared from my sight. I was thinking of you and I hoped you were having a lovely afternoon. I hope you weren't too cold? I am going to bed soon as it's late. I hope I sleep better tonight, though I shall look for the moon again and be thinking of you. I hope you are having a lovely afternoon? Bonne nuit mon amour. xoxo

Anonymous said...

I found a wonderful circle of stones, this afternoon. Hidden in forest bramble. I shall tell you about it very soon. C.B.

dianne said...

Hello my dear, I did not know when I would hear from you but I hoped you would see my message here. I was going to do a new post hoping you would see it. I have some lovely photos of daisies in my phone but I don't seem to be able to post them onto my blog. I think I need to download an app. to allow me to do so. I also found a scanned photo of myself from back in the 1970's but I would not post that on social media. You did have an exciting day yesterday, that is such a wonderful find! I wonder how long the stones have been there for? I look forward to hearing about your circle of stones!
I could not see the moon last night as the sky was so cloudy. It was so much cooler last night and this morning, a pleasant 17'C instead of 35'C, I hope it rains as the garden is so dry. Take care dear one, much love Dianne. xoxo

dianne said...

Hello dear C.B., I don't know whether you have returned to see my previous reply to your last message. I hope you are well dear one? I was hoping you would tell me more about your circle of stones...did you find them on one of your walks through the New Forest? I guess I will just have to be patient and wait for your reply when you feel like sharing details of your discovery. I may be going into hospital for minor surgery tomorrow or over the weekend. I won't know until I see the specialist surgeon tomorrow. If you read this will you please say a prayer for me? I hope to hear from you soon. Until then you are always in my thoughts and prayers!
Much love dear one, Dianne. xoxox