A Memory of Autumn

I visited my dear friend Corby today at her blog Alae and read her beautiful post...it brought back the memory of something I had experienced and it all came flooding back to me...a 'moment in a memory' as I called it.

And as it is now early Autumn or Fall here, the days have a familiar feeling to them, to that time which I will relate to you... when the days are getting shorter, the mornings and evenings are cooler, something which I welcome and the sun is getting lower in the sky.

It was a morning in late Autumn, in the month of May when I was walking along a path that I had taken so many times before, past many trees, some evergreen and others deciduous which were now stark branches naked of their colourful autumn foliage.

It was very cold, the sky was a bright clear blue but I could still feel some warmth from the sun as it beamed in the sky touching everything with a slight golden hue, including me. I walked along observing my surroundings and some of the time lost in my thoughts like we all do, when something stopped me and interrupted my meditation.

There were some leaves of many autumn hues, golden, orange and russet swirling around just above the surface of the gray road, for a slight breeze had picked them up and they moved in circles swirling around being moved by the breeze, it would let them rest for a few seconds then pick them up again and continue with their merry dance, moving in one direction then another back and forth.

I watched with amazement at this colourful display of movement until they had all been dispersed and disappeared just like the breeze and now rested amongst and blended in with the many other leaves of colour beside the road; I thought how beautiful this is, a moment in time that I shall probably never see again.
I felt something welling up inside me, from deep within, something that was familiar but something I had not felt in such a long time and as I felt a lump in my throat and the tears filled my eyes and ran down my cheeks I realised what I feeling was happiness...
I cried and dropped slowly to the ground, I sobbed but I didn't realise why until I felt the release of so much pent up sadness...
I had not realised until this very moment that it had been such a long time since I had felt happiness...as sadness seeps into us slowly and unknowingly over time, when life's disappointments bring us down, it is not something we can touch, it is not tangible but it is there just the same and we can feel it eating away at us.

I love Autumn for all of the reasons I have described and hope one day I will see the leaves dancing again, for that moment to me was profound and defining, as I realised when life and people let you down you can always look to nature for beauty and some much needed happiness. ♥